Sunday, April 25, 2010

No Control-Part Three, Section IV

I'm in better conditions now. I get to eat, I've gained weight, and I've been give a slate on which to write. I've been writing and re-writing the Party slogans over and over. If I do this, I'll truly believe.

But today I made a mistake. All of the sudden, out of the blue, my love for Julia took control of my entire being. I yelled her name. I couldn't even stop after one time. I yelled Julia at the top of my lungs. I know I'll be tortured for it. I know, but I just can't hold it in.

I hate Big Brother. But if O'Brien knows this, I'll never be killed. If I hold it inside of me and hide away my hatred, so I don't even realize it's in me, I will die hating Big Brother. I will have won and beaten the Party at their own game.

But as soon as O'Brien comes in, I tell him of my hatred for Big Brother, to which he replies that I must not only obey Big Brother, I must love him, truly and completely. And with that, O'Brien told the guards--Room 101.

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